Letting Go of Expectation

You’d think after two and a half years of being a mother, I’d have embraced two of the most important rules of motherhood: 1.) Don’t set expectations for yourself, 2.) The ONLY thing you can expect during any given day is the unexpected.

Quite frankly, I think I’m dealing with the said unexpected much better these days. I know this because this is how my phone conversation went with my husband earlier today (the poor soul who bears the brunt of my unmet expectation frustration).

Me: Hey

Him: Hey, how’s it going?

Me: I promise this is the last time I’m going to call, I know you have work to do. (It was the 3rd time I’d called him in ½ an hour).

Him: No, really, I don’t have anything to do…(go ahead and laugh, the sarcasm was rising)

Me: Well, I dropped A (our 2 yr. old) off at playschool at 9:30, brought E (9 mo. old) home for her nap at 9:45. She was wide awake in her crib for an hour until I went into her room and she literally laughed at me from her crib. Now the playschool just called and asked me to pick A up because she’s been crying all morning.

Him: Wow. You’re not swearing at me yet.

Me (trying to be a more patient mommy and loving wife): Mmmm. No. Saving that for later.

Him: Can’t wait…

(Just a little backstory. A goes to playschool at a lovely church 10 minutes from our house once a week. I drop her off, E naps. I get 2 hours of free time to clean, write, whatever. The obvious EXPECTATION here: 2 HOURS of free time!)

Oddly enough, I was really doing ok. In the past I’ve called my hubby all gruff, and crabby and bothered. Today I was really glad that at least the sun was shining. I was rolling with the punches.

Never mind the fact that besides wanting to tackle a sky high pile of laundry, clean the pile of clothes off of my bed and wash our filthy kitchen floor that I was just starting to gather the gumption to call an editor I’ve been trying to gather the gumption to call for over a month to see if she had any freelancing gigs.

Maybe I was just glad to have another excuse not to call the editor. Or maybe I’m really learning to let go of expectations.

Whatever the case, E is screaming from her crib because she is on a nap strike today…and so I must go…