Coffee Anyone?!

Do you love coffee as much as  I do? I posted about my appreciation for coffee (and my deeper understanding of my father in the process) over at A Little Monkey Business! Because, after all, who could keep up with the monkey business if not for the coffee...Read more here!

5 Minute Fridays:Grit

(Today I have joined up with the Gypsy Mama for 5 Minute Friday...check it out...a whole lot of writers, getting together to sew words together around one word...and in the process creating community).

Grit...

Where does one start with a word like "grit"...I confess, I started with the dictionary (probably a small "cheat" considering I'm timing myself and did not include my "time" in the dictionary. Probably also the former English teacher in me coming out)...

Nevertheless...there were two definitions, both accurate, and telling...

1. A hard shaped granule
2. firmness of mind or spirit, unyielding courage in the face of hardship...(synonyms being "fortitude" and "spunk"

What strikes me as interesting is that in one capacity, grit (the hard shaped granules) could be irritating, bothersome and frustrating...

If I were on a long journey, so to speak and there were "grit" in my shoes...it would drive me batty.

But isn't it the "grit" in our lives...the little, hard things...that inevitable form strength. Isn't it the daily frustrations, the rebellious children, the difficult neighbor, the challenging co-worker, the needing to make ends meet when the finances are difficult...it is the grit in our lives that makes us stronger...

Grit of one sort develops the grit of another...

I want to be a woman, a mother a wife, a daughter of Christ who is firm in mind and unyielding in the face of difficulty...I want to be "gritty", but it takes facing "grit" to get there...

I only become that woman as I learn to react more firmly, more responsibly, more Godly in the face of challenges in my life...

As we learn to respond to the small, hard pebbles, we become larger, stronger, more able...


STOP...

Bumper Sticker Taglines

I decided this morning that if I could create a bumper sticker this is what it would say...

"I'm Not Lazy I Just Have Kids"

I wish I were artsy and knew how to create a cool little button for ya'll to add to your Pinterest pages, but I'm not...So if you're artsy and know how to create buttons and Pinterest postables, I give you permission to use my tagline and create away. Just send it over this way so I can use it too! 

This was the best I could come up with in the meantime...

I would take that bumper sticker and place it strategically on my car so that when I drop my children off at preschool, or when we are unloading ourselves in the parking lot at Target and a stranger happens to walk by and witness an odd assortment of unmatching shoes, several old plastic bags, a sippy cup, crushed goldfish, a backpack and a purse,  also falling out of the backseat with my children...they will not be tempted to think...

Geez lady...you should clean your car once in a while. 

I would also place it on my front door, near the doorbell. This way when the UPS guy shows up at our house (like he often does because Scott has a lot of work stuff shipped here since he works from a home office on many days), he won't be able to stare wide-eyed behind me at the blankets, odd balls, shoes, tools from overdue construction projects, dirty floor mats and unfinished flooring laying right near the front door and think...

Geez lady...think you should clean your house? 

I would also place one on Ava's backpack. This way when her teacher happens to see her with it and help her put her papers and folders in, but finds one odd sock, a headband, an old juice cup, and my checkbook in the bottom, she might be less tempted to think...

Geez mom...think you should clean this out?

Heck...I'm just going to slap those bad boys all over my kitchen floor, bathroom mirror, all entry ways to the house and on several random walls in conspicuous places. This way when a neighbor unexpectedly arrives and sees dishes towering in the sink, clutter covering every conceivable kitchen surface, random books, toy parts, DVD's and ribbon scattered across the floor, and unidentifiable sticky, gooey ick on the floor near the table... they won't be as tempted to think..

Wow...aren't you home all day...why do you DO?! Maybe you should clean your house. 

Of course I'm just having some fun here, but it dawned on me today, because my children are away for four days (they're with their grandmother in Ohio),that  as I cleaned the living room and knew it would stay cleaned, as I wiped the bathroom counter tops and realized it might be the only time I'd have to do it all week, as I picked up the odd shoes from around the first floor of the house and placed them back in the mudroom...that I'm not the lazy, completely disorganized mother I often create myself out to be in my own head...

We do clean, it simple gets undone. We do like to organize, there simply is no time. We do wipe the counters they simply get pawed, and wiped and toothpaste dirty again within 18 hours. I do prefer Ava's backpack to be organized, it's just that by the time we get home and need to unload everything out of the car I also have hungry children, grocery bags and mail in my arms...the excess needs to get dumped somewhere, right? 

So, today, in my quiet and still house I'm relishing in the knowledge that A) I'm not lazy, B) I'm as tired and scattered as I am because I am always moving and grooving and making quick decisions because that is what the day requires of me C) This is all a season...and with every season things change...Next year it will be crayons and glue sticks and art projects from school that scatter the house and demand organizing prowess on my part! D)Your brain does start to come back into your head (slowly!) when you have a day to think, clean and process...

Scott and I are counting our blessings for the sweet princesses that we miss, for the loving family members that love our girls as much as we do and who take opportunities to love on them for days at a time, and for the grace and space that it allows us to catch up, breathe deep and realize we haven't gone completely crazy after all.

...and, perhaps most importantly, that we still enjoy spending time together in the midst of it all! 

Giving Thanks for the Unexpected

Unmet expectations. A change in plans. Suprises. Joys. Heartache. Worries.


Amy Julia Becker's experience as a first time mom was, in many ways, no different than mine, yours, the moms in my MOPS group...any mom you might meet at Target.


The feelings are universal, though each mom's journey is as different as the children we bring into the world.


For Amy Julia Becker this meant first time motherhood was also accompanied by words she did not expect. Down syndrome. Special needs. Increased risk for heart problems, eye sight impairment, challenged mobility, among a long list of other possible challenges...Things every mom hopes she never has to hear...Things that are difficult and challenging to process, especially when the come unexpectedly.


In her book "A Good And Perfect Gift: Faith, Expectations and a Little Girl Named Penny" Becker recounts her first year as a mom to a beautiful little girl named Penny. A little girl who happens to have Down syndrome. A little girl full of smiles, giggles and joy.


I met Amy Julia at a writing conference almost four years ago now. She is a good writer, a great mom, a bright and insightful woman (I won't lie...I envy her degree from Princeton!). She has a wonderful knack for telling the stories of her life in a way that makes them personable, relateable and inspirational.


Her book is as much about her spiritual journey as it is about motherhood. About how our spiritual journeys can become confusing when we're not sure how to reconcile our circumstances with our Christian faith...when the two things don't seem to make sense together. It's about those times when life doesn't go as we had planned and we're not sure we like the fact that it might be going just as God had planned...


She says...

I didn't open my Bible often those days. I didn't pray much eaither. I would have liked to ignore God all together, but my whole adult life had been consumed with Christianity. I couldn't get away even though a part of me wanted to. 

...I closed the Bible, my finger holding my place. There was so much of me that didn't want to remember the abundance of my life as a Christian. I had a shelf of journals, and I could take down any one of them to find answered prayers, verses from teh Bible that spoke to my everyday life, whispers of the Spirit of cofmort, purpose, blessing. And here was Jesus saying, "Don't you remember?" 

I couldn't forget. The time on the beach where I had heard words as distinct as an audible voice saying, "I am with you."... The time in college when I was afraid to go back to school said to my mother, "I just want someone to be there with me to hold my hand." That same evening I had gone upstaris and picked up a dusty book filled wiht Bible verses from the bootom shelf of my bedside table. I opened at randome and read, "For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you." And when I returned to school the next day, here was a card from my grandmother in my mailbox. Printed on the inside was the same verse, as if God wanted to make sure I was paying attention." 

The other reason the book really resonated for me was because I have a very good friend who has a sweet little boy with Down syndrome. He just turned 1 last month.  She too experienced the confusion of unexpected news...finding out in the hospital, after his birth, that things were not as she and her husband had thought or planned. 


Living life with her through our phone calls, reading Amy Julia's book...they have been eye opening to me. Eye opening to the fact that being a mother to a child with Down syndrome is not all that different than being a mother to any other child...As a matter of fact my friend Sara's  sweet little boy is often the least of her troubles...His big bright blue eyes often smiling away while his two older sisters wreak havoc on the house and their mother's mental health!


I am thankful for these gifts in my life...the gift of a book that opened my eyes, the gift of a friend whose life took an unexpected turn and the grace I have watched her walk through it with...these things, they strengthen my faith and expand my heart.


Becker makes an incredibly insightful observation at the end of this story. She defines the one thing we all have in common: We are imperfect because we are human.

Penny wasn't a perfect child. Neither was William. We weren't a perfect family, and we never would be, at least not by the standards I would have set out for us years earlier. But we were coming closer to our telos, our true perfection, because we were learning what it meant to be human, what it meant to be whole.

If you are looking for an inspirational read I would highly recommend "A Good and Perfect Gift"...It is a story that will encourage you to count all of your blessings-- both the expected and the unexpected.