Monday, August 29

Prescription from the Beach...One Dose of Reality


           Yes. I, my friends, just spent five days last week in Bermuda. Yes, the water was as beautifully turquoise as everyone says it is and it was 83+ and sunny all week long. Not one single drop of hurricane rain or bad weather.

     And then somehow, perhaps by luck or perhaps an answer to my ardent prayers, we had a completely uneventful flight home from Bermuda to Philadelphia and then Buffalo, on Saturday. It was a bit cloudy and rainy, but I've felt worse turbulence on flights in perfectly sunny weather.  No one can believe that the hurricane did not affect our trip at all, but it is true. We were not affected, except for some short lived speculation in Bermuda that our flight would be cancelled, but it never was.  Hooray! and thank God. I truly believe it was His blessing and gift to us to have such a wonderful week of weather and easy travel. 

     For those of you who don't know the story, we did not just come into a great sum of money and find ourselves suddenly wealthy and deserving of a great beach trip...However, Scott did work hard enough this year to have reached well over 100% of his sale goal and this was the grand-prize- 5 days in Bermuda (next year it is Rome!).

   So, while we are not suddenly rich, I guess it was a pretty nice bonus and pretty lucky for us. 
   While Bermuda was wonderful, my pre-Bermuda expectations were impractical. Aren't they always?!

     I'm here to tell you two things that I learned from taking a trip to Bermuda with my husband...

1.) Taking a trip with your husband IS wonderful. It was nice to lay on the beach, ride a moped, enjoy quiet meals served to us and then cleaned up afterwards, no making of beds or loading dishwashers or picking up toys. It was just nice to take a deep breath...We smiled, we laughed, we momentarily forgot about all of the stressors that stand between us on a daily basis. That part was good and much needed. It was kind of like one very long date.   

But, as you all know, every wonderful date must come to an end and you have to get back into the swing of things and return to your normal routine. Which leads me to #2. 
2.) Taking an all expenses paid trip to Bermuda does not automatically wash over several years of long nights, gray hairs, busy children, busy days, or the stress that goes into parenting. It allows you to not think about it for a couple of days, but unbeknownst to me, it takes several days to unwind and then it's almost time to go home. So, despite being away from home for 5 days, you do not get through all the magazines you've wanted to read (I didn't get around to reading one), or the books (I read about 150 pages of one of the three that I brought), or refuel on all the sleep you feel you've missed in your time as a parent (I think we went to bed later because of work related parties, didn't nap, and kept busier seeing sights and enjoying the island than we would have anticipated). 
      I had created this idea in my mind that going away to Bermuda was going to completely rejuvenate me, refill me with ALL of the energy I possessed before children, equalize my mind and order all of the things in it to make me feel like an entirely new person. 

     I'm just wanting to tell you, that if you were insanely jealous that I got to go to Bermuda because you have ideas, like I did, that it somehow it miraculously makes you feel 25 again (like the hundreds of the other people from Scott's company who were also in Bermuda), erases all of tiredness that accumulates, or makes your gray hairs go away,  that's not the case...sorry to say...

     So, after five days away I feel...
a) even older...after spending time on the beach in what I thought was a pretty cute bathing suit until I realized my suit  covered a WHOLE lot more of my mommy belly and bum and made me look a whole lot older than the other girls on the beach who were quite young, without children, and looked as if they had stepped off the set of an MTV beach party. 
b) somewhat wiser and much more realistic because I realize that a trip doesn't change everything (as perhaps I had dreamed before!) which means that it truly is important to find your contentment, peace and satisfaction, not necessarily away from the craziness of life, but in the midst of the craziness of life...A trip certainly helps to set the stage for that, but it doesn't change anything for you.
 c) more connected to Scott. We were nit picking at each other like crazy before we left...about life, about preparations, about the kids. It's important to get away from all of that to realize you are actually a couple who enjoys spending time together... it's kind of like hitting the "refresh" button on your computer once in a while. 
d.) still tired...and realizing I just might always feel this way until...well, maybe after the girls are in college?!!! Who knows! 

     In conclusion...for those who were wondering... it was a lovely trip, with delicious food and beautiful beaches....
     BUT, don't think you'll never be able to catch up on life, reconnect with your husband, or feel energized again until you take some great tropical vacation... A trip is good, but not as miraculous as you might think...Find peace here, carve out time to connect with your husband now, and make time for some of those magazines and books while sitting right on your very own couch...It is there that you will actually find true contentment... 

      I'm not saying I've found it quite yet...I'm just saying I've figured out where it actually is...

And, of course, as much as a few days away is good, one of the best parts of the week was coming back on Saturday evening to the thrilled faces of our girls...this is us at the park earlier today-- Ava in her Bermuda t-shirt and Ella refusing to smile! 


  1. Well said my friend! I am still jealous...but in a nice, you deserve to be tired from your tropical getaway...way :-) Pizza night soon to catch up??

  2. Great trip honey. Let's go again next week.

  3. we shared comments about bermuda a while back and i just clicked over out of curiousity to see if you had gone or not. so glad you had fun on your trip. so many amazing memories, but you are right about creating time right here and right now!

    lol about the bathing suit... after three children and 43 years on this earth mine has a (gasp)skirt. although part of that is me just being modest in my dress.

    and about your previous post, if you ever need a publisher i have an aunt in the business.


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